Lost Memories
by Minor Arcana
Summary: After finding his wife and unborn child dead, Atemu cries himself into a heavy sleep where his wife comes to him and he reveals all his fears. Will he lose faith in what he's meant to do? Or will he carry on despite the pain in his heart?


**Disclaimer**: Yu-Gi-Oh is not mine. It belongs to Kazuki Takahashi and any affiliated parties.

**Author's Note:** Some real Egyptian words are used in this fic – Per A'a was the word for Pharaoh – Kemet meant Egypt and Hem Ntjr means High Priest, who in this case is Priest Set. This is written by a different member of the group than the one who wrote The Reeds, The Lotus and The High Priest, but I hope you enjoy it all the same.

**Summary**: After finding his wife and unborn child dead, Atemu cries himself into a heavy sleep where his wife comes to him and he reveals all his fears. Will he lose faith in what he's meant to do? Or will he carry on despite the pain in his heart?

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**Lost Memories**

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Night set heavily upon the land of Kemet as the young Per A'a laid asleep on his bed. Atemu's legs dangled loosely over the side as his head rested in the crook of one of his arms from where he'd simply flopped down earlier. His wife was dead, along with his unborn child, Kemet was falling apart and his own Hem Ntjr had betrayed him.

Atemu felt like he couldn't go on anymore; it was becoming too much for even the Per A'a of Kemet to take. How could so many bad things happen all at once? Talk about bad luck.

As the Per A'a's mind wandered aimlessly and lost itself in a barren dreamscape, these thoughts seemed to slowly die along with his strength, his will and even his heart. His feet trod a dark road through his mind, not even making a sound as they were absorbed by the shadows that seemed to haunt his every waking and sleeping moments. Lifting his hands so he could just about see them, Atemu saw dried blood caking them; his wife's blood. His crimson eyes shimmered as freshly formed tears trickled down his face and into the shadows.

_Why?_ he asked himself. _Why bother carrying on? This whole thing is becoming meaningless. Everything good is gone, from good people to good memories._

"I can't take this anymore!" Atemu cried and dropped to his knees in anguish before slamming his clenched fists onto the ground.

To his surprise as this happened, his Millennium Puzzle lit up and sent waves of gold light ahead and around him. The light lit up the beautiful area of a garden, lit by dozens of torches. It was the palace gardens, Atemu realized, and there was the solar disc fountain at its centre; the most impressive fountain of them all. The water spouted from the beaks of the birds at the side of the disc, the two beautiful Ibis that signified the coming of the floods of the Great River that his people longed for every year to sustain the land and themselves. It trickled into smaller basins that grew wider until they reached a massive one on the ground, where a large pool of water sat.

Atemu got up and walked over to it before sitting on its rim and slowly trailing his bloodied fingers through the cold water. Ripples expanded throughout the once calm surface, shimmering under the light of full moon and the crackling torches. As he looked into the water, a form began to take shape. Looking closer, the Per A'a recognized the soft blue hair and kindly, gentle eyes of his now deceased wife.

At first, Atemu thought his eyes were playing tricks on him, but as he turned his eyes slightly he saw her standing at his side.

The young Per A'a got up and turned to face his wife, his eyes portraying his shock. She stared back at him quietly, questioningly.

"Why the tears my love?" she questioned in a monotone voice.

"Why?" Atemu echoed. "You're on a one way trip to the Afterlife, that's why."

Subira's lips turned up at the ends in a slight smile before she walked around Atemu and sat down on the edge of the fountain, her dress swishing around her ankles as she walked. She looked down into the water, staring at the moons reflection, before dipping her hand into the cold liquid and dispersing it.

Atemu followed her movements closely and his fingers suddenly felt cold and numb, as if they'd been held in cold water for a long time.

"Do you remember this setting?" she asked eventually, as she turned her head to look at him.

"Of course, this is where we always met," Atemu responded as he sat beside Subira.

Nodding, the young woman reached out and touched his hand; her hand was cold and wet from the water it seemed although Atemu felt that it wasn't totally the reason for it.

"Then you haven't lost your good memories have you?" Subira stated.

"How did you?" Atemu asked, eyes widening. "I may be dead, my darling," the girl told Atemu with a light chuckle. "But I'm far from stupid. I know you want to give up, but for the sake of Kemet and its people, you can't."

Atemu looked at Subira; how could she say such a thing? Everything he'd vowed to protect was crumbling at his feet, and everyone who'd been close to him was now gone in some way. Set had betrayed him and left, Mahado was dead, his father was gone and now Subira and his unborn child were gone and Akunadin… Well, he didn't know what to make of what the old priest was doing. Kemet was becoming a crumbling ruin, and even now Atemu felt like he couldn't control it anymore.

The Per A'a gritted his teeth painfully and his fist hit the water, sending up a large spray of the cold liquid over the side and onto the floor. Subira gazed down at the hem of her dress as water dampened it and stared at the small puddle of water at their feet.

"Atemu," she breathed. "I know you're angry, but you've got to try and channel it. Don't take it out on yourself, please."

"I can't, Bira!" he cried as he stood up and turned away from her. "I can't! You don't understand this stress!"

Sobs wracked the young ruler's body, and his shoulders heaved as his tears flooded from his eyes; he'd held them back for so long he just had to let them go.

"Damn the world!" he screamed as he walked over to a dream image wall and punched it hard with his fist. "What's the point of carrying on when everything you do or try fails miserably? What's the point of trusting when those you trust stab you in the back! It's all a joke; life is nothing but a cruel, heartless joke!"

As he collapsed against the wall and cried uncontrollably, Atemu felt a pair of loving arms wrap around his waist and tighten their grip. Subira rested her head on his shoulder, and he could feel her warm breath floating onto his neck. She nuzzled his cheek gently and he could feel the softness of her hair against his skin; it felt comforting in a way.

"And you," he whispered. "You died and now there's no one to rule at my side."

"I couldn't help my death," she told him softly. "As much as you couldn't help it. I know you're angry, frustrated and in pain, but you mustn't let it cloud what you believe in. If you won't do what you must for your people, do it for me, and if not for me then for yourself. You're the one who's the most important now my love, you mustn't forget that."

Atemu turned and gazed at Subira quietly, her eyes soft and staring at him with hope that he'd understand. Reaching up with his hand to wipe his face, he saw the blood was gone, and checking his other hand he found the same thing.

"How?" he breathed.

"Your good memories overrule your bad ones," Subira told Atemu gently, looking him in the eye. "Now wake up and go and do what you must. I know the most loyal friends you'll ever know will aid you, and I'm with you in spirit. I said I'd never leave your side, and in that way I never will."

Leaning forward, Subira placed a light kiss on Atemu's lips, just as a white light began to form behind her and in seconds it was so bright that it was blinding the young ruler.

"We will meet again…" her voice echoed, as things suddenly went black.

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Blinking, Atemu sat up on the edge of his bed and found himself staring at the sandy coloured walls of his room, listening to the crackling of the burning torches around it. He gazed down at his hands to see the physically dried blood still there, but the bed sheet had absorbed most of it. Walking over to a water basin, he washed the rest off and dried his hands on a piece of linen as he remembered what Subira had said about his good memories overruling the bad ones.

Turning, Atemu headed out onto the balcony and stared up into the star speckled sky.

_I'll do this for you and all those I love Bira_, he thought softly, hoping she'd hear him. _I swear it._


End file.
